Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Oh yeah...

TODAY...I went to the gym!!  I wasn't sure what I would be capable of...but I did a class and was SO excited.  I am pretty sure I just sat there with a big grin on my face the WHOLE time.  It felt so good to move my body.  I can't wait until I can try tennis again!!!!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Just SOME of the things I am grateful for this year...

We had a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving at my parents with family and friends.  I felt strong, my children were happy, my mom is feeling better (after a big surgery 2 weeks ago), and our hearts were full as
We went around and each drew a scrabble tile and shared things we were grateful for that began with the letter we picked.  It was amazing how easy it was to think of things (except for the letter "Z".)  We truly are blessed!  Silly picture, I know...but this is me...grateful to be doing dishes.  It is amazing what you miss after a year of not being able to do anything for yourself.  I was just thrilled to have the energy and strength.  It was a beautiful day! 

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

The best medicine...

I didn't go out with them, but Larry did.  They went sledding and enjoyed the snow yesterday! 
I am just enjoying seeing them SO HAPPY!  Laughter, giggles, and ear to ear smiles...they have AMAZING healing properties.  Try it! :)

Making up for LOST time...and LOVING it!!

I haven't sat down to blog...because I am ALIVE...and feel ALIVE...and I am cherishing every moment.  I am completely trying to make up for lost time.  I am still very weak but am gaining strength each day.  The girls and I are so excited to have some time together this week with no school...and I am actually excited to clean, bake, play, and just do what moms and daughters usually do.  I can't wait!

I had an appointment last week with my local surgeon and got good news.  It doesn't look like I am going to need another surgery to place another drain for my bowel perforation.  I have gained weight (which was what they wanted...), I am feeling stronger, and it seems like it is almost healed.  He was thrilled with my progress.  That was the last thing that was hanging over me right now.  The open incision on my abdomen is also closing off, so it seems like I can now move forward.  I was SO relieved!

I had been searching for something that I could get to symbolize my battle with cancer...and remind me my own strength.  I found this amazing woman on etsy that made this necklace for me.  The picture doesn't do it justice...as it means SO much to me and I wanted to share.  It symbolizes surviving...the beads are "amber" which symbolize my cancer...and the ribbon is for cancer awareness.  I LOVE it!  She has necklaces that reflect other things as well (other cancers, autism, hobbies,etc.) and I love what she made for me. 

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

I few things I had MISSED...that aren't to be taken for granted!

Showering!  That amazing gift has been returned after MONTHS.  I have been able to shower for about a week now and everyday, I just want to stand there until there until the hot water gives out.  For months, I had to bathe in about 4 inches of water, skillfully scrub the rest, and wash my hair in the kitchen sink.  It is amazing to just stand in warm, running water without the fear that you will get some attached pump or some wound wet.  I am SO grateful to be able to shower!!!!!

And I am driving again.  That might be another thing taken for granted, but it had been months since I had driven myself anywhere.  My van missed me...and I missed my independence.  I have even driven my youngest to preschool like a normal young mom this week.  Her teacher cornered me after I picked her up that day and told me that it was the first time in two months of school that Addie was bubbly and talkative.  I think she was just thrilled to have her mom back...this has really taken a toll on ALL of my family.  She has been stuck to my side since I have started living again and keeps saying, "aren't you too sick, Mommy?"  

Sunday, November 7, 2010

My heart is full...

My 7 year old taught us an amazing lesson on the power of prayer last night and how much it can change lives.  She planned her lesson, made her visuals, gathered us together, and made my heart even more full of love and appreciation for her.  I am so grateful for my girls...I can't imagine what my life with be without their love!

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Guess What...

Appendix cancer has a ribbon Color...Amber!
  The logo to the right is one of the designs that I found online for appendiceal cancer.  I even love the color.  It made my day.  Now, my lifelong battle with be to promote awareness, help other patients as an advocate, and earn money for research.  (maybe one day I can get the NFL to wear amber...the appendix is just as scary to have cancer in as breasts....)  THere are several new clinical trials that would help my cancer and I am working to put together a run in my area to fund research for this spring.  My degree is in Marketing communictions...so this is exactly what I enjoy.  It feels good to have a bit of energy to even think of tackling such a project. 

Also: The drain that was removing the bowel material from my abdomen had to be removed this morning because it lost suction.  It has been in since the surgery (over 5 weeks) but the stitches had come out twice and it had been inching out over the last week.  We are hoping the body will create its own pathway out for the "foreign matter," but there is a chance for complications.  That is the focus of my prayers now...I just hope it heals and that I can avoid more surgeries/doctors. 
I am ready to start living my life again! :)

Tuesday, November 2, 2010


Today is Nov. 2nd...and that marks 14 months of being sick. 
I ended up in the hospital on Sept. 2nd last year horribly ill with a ruptured appendix after it was misdiagnosed in the ER. (as many of you know...) 
 That is what spread my cancer from stage 1 to stage 4, but we had NO idea at the time. 
Some people say that time flies...but I can tell you that the last year or so has just drug on!
MY GOAL: By Dec. 2nd...I want to have my body healed and be able to focus on my FAMILY for the holidays!
(Side note: Today,  I went walking around the block with a friend and I made it!!!  I was THRILLED!!!)

Monday, November 1, 2010

Happily Exhausted...and HALLOWEEN!

This weekend I tried to do EVERYTHING...and today I am simply exhausted...but HAPPILY exhausted!!!
I was able to take my girls to the trunk or treat at church...I drove the golf cart while they trick or treated around our block last night...and I even got to go to church yesterday!  It was ALL wonderful. 
Aana was the young Cleopatra and Addie was a Halloween Fairy
(though when people asked what she was...she answered "umm...I don't really know!") 

I am sore...SO sore...and tired, but couldn't have asked for a better weekend considering the circumstances.

Just for KICKS!

 Aana's soccer season just ended, but we have finally found a sport that she really seems to LOVE!!!  I missed her entire season due to hospitals and illness, but on Friday they had a parent/child game and a party to celebrate their great season.  I got to see that...and she was SO happy!  I even went to a movie with Larry afterward...and we got a mini date.  It was so NICE to get out of the house so much that day!  A great start to a great weekend!!!